Elijah Wood is a “Maniac,” maniac on the floor… and he’s slashing like he’s never slashed before

"Maniac”

Not Rated, 89 minutes

When you think of actors who could play a serial killer, Elijah Wood doesn’t jump to the top of the list. But even with his tiny demeanor, Wood provides a creepy killer named Frank, who likes playing with mannequins in a remake of the 1980 slasher film.

Frank and one of his lady friends

             Shot in first person, we see and hear Wood, but only occasionally see his face in reflections/mirrors. The gimmick works in the beginning, but got kind of boring as the film forged on. It even cheats during some of the violent scenes, pulling back and letting us see all of the mayhem.

Speaking of the violence, “Maniac” pulls out all the stops as Wood continually scalps women for their hair (to put on his mannequins), severed limbs and plenty of blood. The film definitely earns its non-rating.

I bet she has a splitting headache 

“Maniac” starts off strong, but does drag during the third act on its way to the epic conclusion. I still think Joe Spinell is the better Frank, but Wood has to rely on lots of heavy breathing and whispers to emote fear, whereas Spinell just looks creepy.

Joe Spinell was one creepy dude

Along with the gore aspect, the film gave off a “Drive”-type of vibe with an opening credit driving sequence and soundtrack full of electro pop. It was an unexpected bonus in my book.

            Sure, Elijah Wood isn’t that scary, but once he starts slicing foreheads the terror builds. I would highly suggest checking out the 1980 original, but I know most of you won’t, so throw down a few bucks on this creepy thriller. 

“Man of Steel” offers a mediocre ride

“Man of Steel”

Rated PG-13, 143 minutes

It was bound to happen. With so much hype surrounding “Man of Steel,” I knew it wouldn’t be the film I was hoping for. And it wasn’t. Sure, there are some decent parts, but when you find yourself bored while two men pummel each other and destroy a city, you know you’re in trouble. And when they do that for almost 90 minutes of a 143 minute film, it seems a bit repetitive. 

Don’t get me wrong, “Man of Steel” is a decent movie, but it’s nowhere near the Dark Knight/Avengers category, which is how we seem to rate superhero films these days. Director Zack Snyder did a decent job (there wasn’t hours of slow-down/sped-up footage whioch seems to be his forte), Russell Crowe was a strong force in the beginning of the film and then turned into a Obi-Wan type character throughout the rest of the film. And even though Michael Shannon gave it his all as supreme baddy General Zod, the film’s action sequences just didn’t wow me. 

I was really excited that Shannon was cast, but I was never afraid of him, which is crucial for a villain 

Surprisingly, it was the films more heartfelt moments — basically anytime Kevin Costner was onscreen as Pa Kent — that really got me enjoying the film but unfortunately, those were few and far between. Once Zod invades earth I kind of lost interest, especially during the action heavy third act.

Who would have thought that Kevin Costner would be the best part of "Man of Steel"

“Man of Steel” has already got a sequel in the works and will probably make millions and millions of dollars this weekend, so it doesn’t really matter what I think. But I do know, that after seeing both films, “This Is The End” is a highly superior film to “Man of Steel,” which is something I never thought I’d say. 

The laughter doesn’t stop during “This is the End”

This Is The End

Rated R, 107 minutes

Being a fan of everyone involved — Danny McBride, Seth Rogen, James Franco, Jay Baruchel, Craig Robinson — I knew "This is The End" would be funny. But I couldn’t imagine the amount of tears streaming down my face during what is easily the funniest movie of the year.  

            We all know the story, James Franco has a Hollywood party and everyone is invited. Seth Rogen meets his good buddy Jay Baruchel at the airport and promises him a weekend of video games, pot and soda. And it all begins great until Rogen suggests going to Franco’s house for a party. Baruchel isn’t too keen on going to the party, but eventually gives in and off they go. And the party is just as you expected, as James Franco lords over the event, Michael Cera does massive amounts of cocaine and Craig Robinson sings some songs. But then the end of the world starts and various celebrities (including Jason Segal, Paul Rudd, Aziz Ansari, Rihanna) attending the party met their ultimate doom.

Yes, as the trailer gave away, Emma Watson is one of many cameo's in the film 

            Six celebrates including Franco, Rogen, Baruchel, Robinson and Jonah Hill, survive the event and barricade up Franco’s house. They take stock of their inventory and head to bed. The next morning they wake up to find Danny McBride, who passed out early and missed the rapture, cooking up a massive breakfast using all of their supplies. From there, the movie turns into a survival film with these extremely funny people, as they are forced to survive together.

I bet they are all looking at something scary

            The entire cast is very funny, but as I expected, Danny McBride owns the show. I laughed out loud for minutes as McBride and Franco have an argument over where to leave bodily fluids and McBride adapting to hell on earth is truly outstanding. He steals the film and creates some of the funniest moments of the movie... including his interesting pet.

Danny McBride eating up all the supplies 

            There’s not a lot of plot to the film, it’s basically just six dudes living together, acting out movie sequels (“Pineapple Express 2”) as the hell outside develops around them. If you don’t like these actors, stay far away from “This Is the End.” But if you find them funny, buy a ticket, strap in and get ready for a truly hilarious movie going experience. 

Just a bunch of dudes surviving the apocalypse 

V/H/S 2 packs plenty of terror

V/H/S 2

Rated R, 96 minutes

I like horror anthology films, especially when they’re done right like “Creepshow” or “Trick ’r Treat.” Even though I’ve become tired of the found footage genre, I enjoy last year’s “V/H/S,” which is why I was excited when a sequel was announced. And boy did it not disappoint, as I actually liked this version better than its predecessor.

            Once again we have four stories, with a wrap around story dealing with a private investigator (who we see at the beginning of the film tape a man cheating on his wife) that breaks into a house, looking for a missing man. Instead he and his girlfriend find a wall of monitors with a number of tapes. As he begins searching the house, she starts watching the tapes and we’re off.

(Spoilers Ahead)

Cyber eye guy was my least favorite of the stories

            The first segment, directed by Adam Wingard (“V/H/S” and “The ABC’s of Death”), is called “Phase I Clinical Trials” and deals with a guy who lost his eye in a car wreck and has it replaced with a bionic eye that records everything. The idea is cool, but the scares are not. He soon starts seeing ghostly figures appear and soon a hot goth girl stops by to tell him that mechanical senses cause you to see or hear or smell dead people, because she used to be deaf and after getting her hearing aid she can hear them. Anyway, she gets naked, they have sex and then some bad stuff happens. This was my least favorite segment of the film and I was a bit worried that they decided to start off with this one.

Zombiecam gives you the attack point of view

           The second segment, directed by Gregg Hale and Eduardo Sanchez (“The Blair Witch Project”), is called “A Ride In The Park,” and it offers a nice twist on the tired zombie genre. A guy is out for a leisurely bike ride with a camera attached to his helemtn, when a woman comes running out of the woods and stops him. She asks for help but soon begins vomiting and when the bike rider goes to help her, she attacks him as she has turned into a zombie. He stumbles a few 100 feet before collapsing and appears to die. A bike riding couple stumbles across him lying there and as soon as they try to help him he attacks them, biting them both. The rest of the story is a first-person zombie cam, as he attacks people and interrupts a kid’s birthday party. This story had a great idea and I thought it tied with the fourth segment as the second best of the film.

There is something wrong with that baby

            The third segment, directed by Gareth Evans (“The Raid”) and Timon Tjahjanto “Macabre,” “The ABC’s of Death”), is called “Safe Haven” and was my favorite of the film. The story follows a news crew in Indonesia that heads to a cult compound to discover the beliefs and practices of this group. But things go horribly wrong and soon people are committing mass suicide, exploding and birthing demons. This segment was totally different than expected and gave me the creeps for days, which is why it was my favorite.

It's all fun and games until aliens show up 

            The final segment, directed by Jason Eisner (“Hobo With A Shotgun”), almost took the title as my favorite, but it lacked the pure evil of “Safe Haven.” The story follows a group of kids whose parent’s head out of town, leaving them under the rule of their older sister. She has friends come over and soon the boys are attacking their sister and her friends and taping them. But the fun quickly ends when aliens attack, picking off the kids one-by-one, as a small camera on the back of the family dog catches the footage. The story offers plenty of jump scares and tension, but the alien’s look a little hokey, which took me out of the tension.

            Along with the wrap around story, “V/H/S 2” offers plenty of chills and thrills for fans of the genre and I can’t wait for a third installment!

Remember, everyone at the same time, ok? 

Evil Dead remake is dead on arrival

   Evil Dead 

   Rated R, 91 minutes

 I have a problem with movie remakes. Sure, a handful of them are good, maybe even surpassing the original, but the majority of the time they are just reprocessed crap looking to earn a buck. This was my first thought when the trailer for the remake of “Evil Dead’ started popping up on my screen. I thought, “why would they remake that classic?” and “didn’t they already remake a better version of “Evil Dead” called “Evil Dead 2.” Hopes weren’t high, but soon reviews started coming in and people kept talking about how gory it was. So I knew I had to see it, but I didn’t want to waste $10, so I waited for it to arrive to the second run theater where admission is only $3.50, and off I went. Well, I just wasted $3.50 on a remake mash up of “Evil Dead” and “The Ring.”

I'm guessing you shouldn't read out loud from a book with a cover made of human skin

             Don’t get me wrong, “Evil Dead” is very gory and it hits a lot of its jump scare moments, but I found myself bored with the film. There was no pencil to the ankle that haunted my dreams years after seeing the original, there was no humor, we barely get any boomstick or chainsaw action (until final moments) and worst of all, there was no Ash (the iconic character Bruce Campbell created).

The biggest change to the story I enjoyed was how the friends retreated to a cabin in the woods to help their junkie friend detox, which led to none of them believing her about being possessed. But other than that, this “Evil Dead’ barely compares to the original. Sure, the film is gory (a character getting repeatedly stabbed in the face with a needle had me cringing) and it moves along at a brisk 91 minutes, but that doesn’t make up for the lack of originality offered. 
            I knew I was in trouble when the poster of the "Evil Dead" stated that is was "The Most Terrifying Film You Will Ever Experience." Why? Because after leaving the theater, I realized that "Evil Dead' wasn't even the most terryfing movie I've seen today (that honor goes to V/H/S/ 2, which i'll review later). Skip this and enjoy the original trilogy. 

A quick way to get rid of your taste buds